The whistle blew, and we all collapsed to the ground. The faint sound of the other team cheering rang as everything went numb. We had just lost the state championship in soccer, what we had worked for all season to achieve. We picked each other up and walked to the bus, riding home in silence, with the only sound being our sniffles.
It took me months to realize that this loss was the best thing that could have happened for me and our team. This loss had a profound impact on our state championship run the next year and helped us come home with the trophy that time.
Every player loves the game when they are winning, but to the next generation of captains and athletes, who are you when the whistle blows and you have lost it all? Because that answer is what separates a good high school athlete from a great one. If you want to build something that lasts longer than a single season, you need to understand these three things.
The first is resilience. One of the greatest lessons I learned the hard way is that losses do not define you; rather, it is what you do after the loss that does. Throughout my career at Morgan, I have lost plenty of games and, most significantly, lost three state championships. Losses at that level especially, can be devastating, but as cliche as it sounds, every loss is an opportunity to grow.
After losing the first state championship appearance of my career, my junior year, my team and I were devastated. We couldn’t see any positives that came from the loss, and the loss was all we could think about when we looked back at the season. Although, what took me some time to learn was that this loss did not define our season. No single loss can do that. This loss showed us what we needed to work on, gave us the motivation to come back even stronger the next year, and made the state championship win the next year that much better. We knew how much it hurt to lose that game and used it as fuel throughout the entire season, eventually leading us to winning the state championship. Losing should never diminish your love for the game, rather it should encourage you to work even harder in order to not feel that feeling of defeat again.
This run to the state championship did not come easy, though, as we once again had to show resilience, as we had lost in the Shoreline tournament for the first time in four years. We felt like we let down not only ourselves but also the many Morgan girls’ soccer players before us. Many players were discouraged and felt like we would fail at states. This is where the next value comes in. Leadership.
Leadership is instilling your love for the sport into your teammates. Lifting them up and encouraging them, but also holding them accountable. Leadership is helping your team keep going when nobody wants to anymore. It is building a positive environment where people strive to be the best they can be for not only themselves but for each other.
My co-captain and I helped lift our team during this time, when everyone was down, and build their spirits for the state tournament. We did this by talking to individual players, specifically who were struggling with their mental health, attempting to build them up, giving 100% at practices, attempting to raise the energy level, instilling team bonding events where we would go to games and have pasta parties, and just building a bond within our team. By the state tournament, we were strong again and ready to go on a run.
Leadership comes in so many forms, whether it is by example or through communication, and can be as simple as encouraging a teammate after a mistake. While records can be broken and people may forget about championships, the influence a player has on their teammates can last for years. The players who leave the greatest mark on their sport are those who not only do well themselves but also make the players around them better.
The last lesson is finding your role models. It is so important to find role models throughout your high school career and to then strive to be that person for someone else. I have had so many role models who were athletes before me, and it has really inspired me to work harder and be just like them. These role models have helped shape my mindset, work ethic, and love for the game. A specific role model I have had is Catie Donadio. When I was younger, I watched her excel on the basketball court and knew I wanted to play just like her. As I grew up, I got the opportunity to be trained by her, and throughout my childhood all the way to the summer of my senior year I had consistent training’s with her. She taught me her experiences and personalized the workouts to what I needed. She taught me a huge lesson that if you are gifted, don’t just focus on yourself, share your knowledge. She helped me so much and provided guidance throughout my basketball career, and is the reason why I decided to hold training’s the summer of my senior year with aspiring younger athletes.
As you gain more experience, younger athletes in the community will begin to look at you the same exact way. They will pay attention to your body language, how you treat others, and how you handle the competition. This is why it is so important to always set a good example so you can guide the future generation of athletes. The best team cultures are built by players following in each other’s footsteps and learning from each other.
So, when the final whistle blows, and you end in defeat, don’t look in the grass in dismay. Look at the people around you, and then look ahead. The resilience, leadership, and the standard set by those who came before you are not about a single win, but rather about building a foundation for a successful program. Now, the championships are yours to win, the armband is yours to wear, and the culture is yours to protect.
